I dont get to see my lads on Christmas day , so we have boxing day as "Crimble Day" So I went to Rovrum to fetch them and whilst driving back I told my two boys that santa wanted them to open the present in the back of the car ............
They opened the large box excitedly shouting " Its great , IT'S A REMOTE CONTROLLED BOAT !!! " . At the bottom of my road there is a park with a pond which was ideal for such a vessel . so excitedly we all instead of going home for sants presents went straight to the pond. We set the boat up instruction by instruction and with battery's inplace and pre first voyage checks complete I place the boat on the pond and off it went , back end up creating good waves as it cut through the water at a decent pace . After about 5minutes my youngest Bill asked if it was his go , so I passed him the controls and said " Go on bill Happy Christmas enjoy."
I must of walked 10 paces when Bill shouted " DAD ! IT'S FUCKIN' SINKING!!!" (Bill doesnt swear ever.) I turned around to see the boat facing upwards grasping to stay up . NO fucking chance. My boys were crying , and I couldnt resist larfing , saluting and shouting "ITS JUST LIKE THE FUCKIN BELGRANO !"
The next day I returned it to T.K. , I reached the returns desk , explained what had happened , peolpe where hurring away redfaced hands over mouths obviously trying not to larf ! The manager came looked at this very large box remote control and wave print packaging and said ...... "How can you return it ? theres no boat ? " I said " I know its at the bottom of the pond !YOU FUCKIN FETCH IT!" by this time people where openly pissing themselves !!! . The manger then rang his boss and I could even hear him pissing himself down the phone . They both agreed that they had never had or heard of a returned goods without the goods! I said to them that it was not fit for purpose under the sales of consumor goods act 1978 clause 3. As the fucker had sunk and I wasnt fetchingt the bastard too bring it back. Anyway I got a credit note , think I'll stink to R.L. shirts from there ........ the bastards larfing at me.lol. Just my ginger luck !
"I live for myself and answer to no one." ~ Steve McQueen. " I wear what I like and I like what I wear." ~ Adam. " It's always been just part of the culture. Growing up, for most working-class kids, is all about football, music and clothes. You might not have much money, but whatever you have got, you're going to look good." ~ Weller.
reminisent of Monty pythons dead parrot sketch ! lol I even mentioned it , but loads are to young to remember it , have a butchers on youtube.
"I live for myself and answer to no one." ~ Steve McQueen. " I wear what I like and I like what I wear." ~ Adam. " It's always been just part of the culture. Growing up, for most working-class kids, is all about football, music and clothes. You might not have much money, but whatever you have got, you're going to look good." ~ Weller.
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Mon Jan 02, 2012 10:34 pm
Just my ginger luck !
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, yer mad man
