You were lucky, could have been a whole lot worse.

My tale of woe was an indirect effect of DIY as I wasn't actually in the act of DIYing when it happened. I'd taken the bannister and spindles off my stairs to have them dipped to get multiple coats of paint removed so the stairs were a bit dodgy seeing as the carpet was removed too. My Mrs had been on nights and knobhead here had had a late night and before going to bed had put the chain on the door (this was before we had double glazing) and also put the alarm on! So she comes home in the morning opens the door but only as much as the chain lets her but the alarm sets in motion. All I remember is her shouting me saying the alarm is going to go off so I flew out of bed still half asleep, totally starkers, slipped on the top step landed on my arse and then went sidewards off the stairs where the spindles once were. Fell head first off the side and naturally put my arms out to break my fall but when they hit the tiled floor both my wrists snapped and then my head hit the floor. Blood everywhere from a split in my head and as I got my head cleared my head and neck felt like a ton of weight was pushing downwards on me. Got up and my Mrs had snapped the door chain as she'd seen me fall through the small glass pane in the door. First thing she asks is "do you need an ambulance?" I look at both my twisted wrists, my right one was at 45 degrees and said "yeah you better had love" and then I went into the kitchen and lay down in the foetal position with an horrible sickly feeling because my neck felt all wrong. Anyway it turned out I'd broke my neck, both my wrists, my right one in three places and needed half a dozen stitches on the top of my head. Didn't come out of hospital for six and half weeks after spending six weeks in skull traction not being able to move. Absolute fucking nightmare.

i was cleaning the combustion chamber on my paslode nail gun once in my old flat ,, took it apart , cleaned the bastard and put it together and fired the thing into the side of the kitchen door,,,,, NADA,,, taken it apart AGAIN and put it together , fired it AGAIN into the side of the door, FUCKING NADA,, taken it apart for the THIRD time screw by screw and put it together SCREW BY SCREW, and fired it AGAIN,, fucking nada,,, the fourth time it took it apart screw by screw, but by this pont my tits were well and truely nipping,,, never put any screws back in that holds the caseing on to the chamber ,, fired the bastard. A FUCKING INFERNO CAME SCREAMING OUT THE ARSE END OF THE THING , NEARLY MELTED MY FACE , i dropped the thing breaking 4 floor tiles , picked the bastarding thing up and smashed it off the wall ,, i had to replace the floor tiles, patch the plasterboard and re-plaster the full wall

Quote: Vasque wrote in post #2

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You were lucky, could have been a whole lot worse.

My tale of woe was an indirect effect of DIY as I wasn't actually in the act of DIYing when it happened. I'd taken the bannister and spindles off my stairs to have them dipped to get multiple coats of paint removed so the stairs were a bit dodgy seeing as the carpet was removed too. My Mrs had been on nights and knobhead here had had a late night and before going to bed had put the chain on the door (this was before we had double glazing) and also put the alarm on! So she comes home in the morning opens the door but only as much as the chain lets her but the alarm sets in motion. All I remember is her shouting me saying the alarm is going to go off so I flew out of bed still half asleep, totally starkers, slipped on the top step landed on my arse and then went sidewards off the stairs where the spindles once were. Fell head first off the side and naturally put my arms out to break my fall but when they hit the tiled floor both my wrists snapped and then my head hit the floor. Blood everywhere from a split in my head and as I got my head cleared my head and neck felt like a ton of weight was pushing downwards on me. Got up and my Mrs had snapped the door chain as she'd seen me fall through the small glass pane in the door. First thing she asks is "do you need an ambulance?" I look at both my twisted wrists, my right one was at 45 degrees and said "yeah you better had love" and then I went into the kitchen and lay down in the foetal position with an horrible sickly feeling because my neck felt all wrong. Anyway it turned out I'd broke my neck, both my wrists, my right one in three places and needed half a dozen stitches on the top of my head. Didn't come out of hospital for six and half weeks after spending six weeks in skull traction not being able to move. Absolute fucking nightmare.

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Quote: dylan wrote in post #4

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Quote: Vasque wrote in post #2

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You were lucky, could have been a whole lot worse.

My tale of woe was an indirect effect of DIY as I wasn't actually in the act of DIYing when it happened. I'd taken the bannister and spindles off my stairs to have them dipped to get multiple coats of paint removed so the stairs were a bit dodgy seeing as the carpet was removed too. My Mrs had been on nights and knobhead here had had a late night and before going to bed had put the chain on the door (this was before we had double glazing) and also put the alarm on! So she comes home in the morning opens the door but only as much as the chain lets her but the alarm sets in motion. All I remember is her shouting me saying the alarm is going to go off so I flew out of bed still half asleep, totally starkers, slipped on the top step landed on my arse and then went sidewards off the stairs where the spindles once were. Fell head first off the side and naturally put my arms out to break my fall but when they hit the tiled floor both my wrists snapped and then my head hit the floor. Blood everywhere from a split in my head and as I got my head cleared my head and neck felt like a ton of weight was pushing downwards on me. Got up and my Mrs had snapped the door chain as she'd seen me fall through the small glass pane in the door. First thing she asks is "do you need an ambulance?" I look at both my twisted wrists, my right one was at 45 degrees and said "yeah you better had love" and then I went into the kitchen and lay down in the foetal position with an horrible sickly feeling because my neck felt all wrong. Anyway it turned out I'd broke my neck, both my wrists, my right one in three places and needed half a dozen stitches on the top of my head. Didn't come out of hospital for six and half weeks after spending six weeks in skull traction not being able to move. Absolute fucking nightmare.

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bloody hell mate I think we should stop the thread now. Nobody will top that.

Thats sounds frightening.

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Blimey Andy, I was going to tell my little drunken DIY tale but I can't even come close to that.

Quote: UncleAlbert wrote in post #7

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Blimey Andy, I was going to tell my little drunken DIY tale but I can't even come close to that.

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Oh well, it nothing as grand as yours. I was off work for a few days and we were planning on painting the hall,stairs and landing. We had the different colour samples up but couldn't decide. Anyway I went to see Doves play and came home pissed, my wife was waiting up and told me when I got in what colour she wanted. I woke up still half cut, went up to Homebase to buy the paint and cracked on with the job. I took a bit of a wobble on the step ladder and fell off spilling paint all over the place, cleaned all that up and finished the job. Felt quite proud when she pulled up on the drive. She walked in and went mad at me, I'd got the wrong paint totally different to what she's told me the night before.

See, they're never happy are they?

That's fookin nowt Andy.... I once stood on an upturned plug with no shoes on while putting a mirror up!

Not been one for DIY, would rather pay someone else to do it.
After reading some of these tales, I'll be sticking to this way of thinking....

I do enough damage to myself at work without doing even more damage when Im at home!!!

horse for course and all that

Christ Andy, sounds horrific!

I was stripping the wallpaper in the living room of a house my rents had just bought, all of a sudden I'm flown backwards against the opposite wall. The chunts there before had just left the old wall light wires under the paper. Live.

Quote: get the beer in wrote in post #15

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The thought of seeing a limp wristed bollock naked Mr. Vasque.

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Not so much a diy accident but gruesome all the same, We had a glad mirror cabinet on the bathroom wall, anyway I gets out the shower drying myself as you do, like somebody possessed, Using the back dry technique I swung my arm our and heard this flesh stabbing sound. I looked and saw the corner of this glass cabinet embedded about Assn inch into my forearm, pulled it out and the corner of cabinet snaps off. So had to pull the bit out and you know the sound that makes. Anyway stitches was the end result. But freak accidents can be bad

fuckin hell once rippin out a window took glass out as you shard of glass straight onto my wrist glass stuck in it luclkily missed my artery .. once bracin some timber with paslode gun boom straight into my leg .... all apart of it .. fuckin hell thats why i aint a joiner anymore ..lol.